As I shared in my previous post, I have felt the tenderness and intimacy of God over the last year during moments of worship. More specifically, through worship music. So, I have decided for the next 30 days leading up to the anniversary of Lizz and the boys going to live with Jesus, to share the worship songs that have healed, resonated, touched my heart, and those that God has used to speak to me…..to heal me. As I review these songs, I can now see how they actually document my journey of healing.
The first song I want to share that had a huge impact on me is from “The Story”. John and I saw a live performance of “The Story” in San Antonio before Christmas 2012. It is a song about Job. When Todd Smith sang this song, I openly wept during the performance. I felt God was speaking to my heart through the performer and words. This song was the beginning of God showing himself to me through my pain and extreme loss of “July 30th”. This song helped me understand a little about God’s sovereignty.
I felt I had boils just like Job….due to the physical pain of grief itself. I felt like sitting in the ashes……just like Job. But God kept holding me and pointing me to this story. Even in the early moments and days after “July 30th”, I so wanted God to help me be able to sing him these words:
But you were the one who filled my cup
And you were the one who let it spill
So blessed by your Holy name
If you never fill it up again
If this is where my story ends
Just give me one more breath to say
And so how does the story end for Job? The man of great faith who lost it all? That Satan was sure he would turn from God? A man who lost his family, his children, his wealth? The story ends in Job 42:12. The Bible says: “ The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part.”
Hallelujah I say, Hallelujah! And I have hope, that just like Job there are blessings for me and my family.
I hope you are blessed!